Animated Short Film WIP: Succor Forlorn

Concept Art Color Mock-Up

HOW THE HECK DID I GET HERE????

Well, THIS is HOW; It started LIKE THIS:

I'd already gone through all the trouble of blogging my goals out on my Main Art Blog when when my #ArtVsArtist/#ArtVArtist/AnimationVsAnimator

Meme videos were still charting on Twitter, plus the fact that Pokemon Go suddenly hit an all time HIGH in user-ship and my Pokemon Go Tweets were also charting still, so my friend Roland & I were discussing stuff, and I had been wanting to re-cut the stuff in my #AnimationVsAnimator meme video into an actual animation/artist/Filmmaker/Dirctor's Demo.

I never got to actually do my final After Effects VFX final edit because the program kept vetoing the clip no matter how compressed I made it, but had no problem importing other videos... this is an issue I often get with Adobe CC and Windows updates, the updates also screwed up my entire iTunes, and my audio/sound card in my computer which was already going bad. (I litterally just started to sort that out FINALLY since last night and all morning today, for the ba-jillienth time trying)

So, not only had I done things like spruce up my Vimeo, portfolios on ArtStation, but I felt this desire to work on JUST a Demo that was a Director's Demo but as a DP (Director of Photography for Cinema).

Here's the HD version from my Meme Clip:

So, I'd started going through my video clips & B-Roll I shot Spring, Summer, and Fall. I wanted it to be a "Video Portrait" but a "Self Portrait" style as a Director/Filmmaker but with just regular camera work and maybe a few VFX thrown in, or some fancy edits.

I found a number of clips I shot of myself, experimental stuff... and at the time, I hated all of it, but, I'd ALSO hated the stuff I actually ended up using in Self Portrait clip I used in my Meme video. So, I decided to try some VFX experiments with the video clips I had. It actually went incredibly well, and was much easier than I'd thought. I'd been so frustrated with After Effects for a week on my Animation/Artist/Filmmaker Demo that I had no expectations for anything to work....

But, THIS is what happened in the 1st one:

Then, I figured, what if I tried this with Trapcode? SO, I did. I did a number of experiments with my B-Roll using Trapcode form...

I had also been suddenly on a 90s/Y2K/2000s Techno kick, and kept finding all sorts of goodies there, with another uptick in my tweets & follows just for THAT stuff on Twitter.... So, I posted more....

Then, a few Techno/Eurodance oldies came up:

Anyways, those were just a FEW of the things that I'd dug up on YouTube, or in my own archives... I'd also even found out that there's a NEW Winamp, and even spent a about 1-2 days making my own Winamp Skins, which ALSO made me VERY interested in 90s & Y2K EVERYTHING all over again! I also got a Skin maker program. If you want some of the Skins I made you can pretty much download ALL of them HERE.

And, since I had been doing VFX Animation Experiments with my B-Roll, I kept stumbling into other things I'd originally wanted to try doing using After Effects CC so then THESE happened:

(BTW: These clips are Creative Commons if you want to rip them n use them for ur own projects)


We had also been hit with so many kinds of weather, and despite this Pokemon Go was going crazy with events, so I often wanted to participate in as many as I could even tho all the PokeStops & PokeGyms are a long walking distance in both directions from my home. Some days I went out, and other days I was stuck inside. Either too cold, too windy, too much snow up to my waste, floods, road construction, power outs, you name it. Not a fan of living in New England AND NEITHER IS MY BACK.

But, it just so happened that on a Thursday evening I was outside playing Pokemon Go trying to do these Pokemon Go event tasks and it was, really cold, I had all the music in my head.... and, I started to realize that maybe a Demo wasn't really the way to go with what I had just made...

I mean, LOOK at all of that stuff!

So, as I was walking around that night I started to have these concepts come into my mind, and it reminded me of some things I had done as a teenager... only more EMO. I didn't usually do EMO sad stuff.... except THIS: (-and maybe some other stuff I no longer have, which I don;t have this one either... )

Fathoming Oubliette

It's titled "Succor Forlorn"

I started to have this concept for a video art piece, the themes, and all of that... so, I sketched up a rough Concept Art which I am hoping to animate starting within the next day or 2:

Also on DeviantArt: Sketch & Color Mock-up

I also wrote a Poem of how I wanted the themes to go. I spent an evening writing it in my paper notebook, then reworked it the following day, and then I also typed and reworked it on another day for about half a day.

The Poem is called "Stargazed Yearning"

You can read the Poem texts HERE.


Then, I wanted to record the audio of myself reciting the poem, but also acting it out... it was a very frustrating endeavor because my spouse was on Spring Break from MASS ARTS Boston, and my daughter also kept having days off, or half days, and I can ONLY record it with NO ONE AT HOME.

I was REALLY feeling it when I 1st wrote it, but couldn't record it due to all the home/house noise. My friend also kept making & breaking his plans with me as well... so, I finally just gave up trying to re-record it after the 3rd day of trying because I just couldn't into the right groove again to connect with the FEELINGS I wanted... and I mean, I tried EVERYTHING like digging up old songs that used to make me cry after a teenaged break-up, dug up photos of ex-boyfriends, or dudes that rebuked me... but, I was just so fed up with wasting time, and since I had recorded at least 7 full long takes, and multiple spot takes of certain segments, I just spent 1-days just chopping & Frankenstein'ing everything until I fore-fit it to work... hopefully it sounds LESS like a hack TRYING to read word-for-word out-loud, and MORE like someone actually abandoned on a planet.

But, anyways, the feedback I got was pretty positive. 

I wanted it to be this kind of fantasy theme, because she mentions she's been stuck on a planet for "1000 orbital planetary years".... So, how long is a year on that planet's orbit? And, how long is 1000 of those years???? So, u start to get a sense that she's not "normal".... as far as Earth goes.
Is she a ghost? 
Is she an alien humanoid? 
Is she an immortal?

So, it's open to interpretation...

The Audio Version is called 
"Stargazed Yearnings" (plural)

This Final Audio Design version took me about a whole day and evening alone:

Also on NewGrounds for Free Download HERE

The short film will be called "Succor Forlorn".

There's a number of discrepancies about the pronunciation of the word "succor". When I was in high school we were taught this words as sounding similar to Olde French and Lantin original pronunciations like "soo-kor" however, online a number of dictionaries tend to list the pronunciation as sounding like "sucker" and is the origin of a baby's pacifier and lollypops & hard candies which were originally all called "suckers". The word originally means to soothe or comfort, but also can mean solace, safety, haven, help, aide, relief, respite, assistance, etc.

But, it's also a pun for "sucker" as in being gullible, mislead, or duped.

She keeps on hoping that when she was left on the planet by someone to save her that they would come back for her, so she keeps on calling out for him to return. 

Anyways, I want to start animating it, hopefully within the next few days. I'm really tired from working on the audio this week, so I didn't work on anything today.

Lively Exotic Motion Graphics Affects Animation in Adobe After Effects CC 2018

 Here's the original graphic circa. 2008:

GIF version on DeviantArt

I'd ESPECIALLY wanted to make THIS ONE into a motion graphics/effects animation video with Adobe After Effects. This one I DEFINITELY could NOT pull of in Premiere. I used the Puppet Pin tool feature to animate the curtains. But, I definitely had to update the graphic to a size for HD. I did this with the "Fallen" graphic as well. Honestly, it's just way better to do this in Adobe After Effects than Premiere Pro.
 

This composition is generally WAY different than my usual stuff. I'm WAY dynamic as an artist, os much drawings are way more animated, in motion, etc. This one is still. It's actually SO rare in my art that I went through my gallery looking for ANYTHING still enough to add effects animation/motion graphics so it wouldn't look like a frozen person, or a sticker on a video.


Adobe After Effects CC 20018

Original Artworks can be found in my gallery HERE on DeviantArt.


At the time when I did this one I was studying dance especially raqs sharqi & tribal fusion (belly dance). I studied every day, because I was suffering from depression, and it made me stop feeling sad or painful. But, I eventually hurt my back.

Several of my influences were people like 1 of my teachers, Zoe Jakes, but also other members of the Belly Dance Super Stars & The Indigo like: Rachel Brice, Sharon Kihara, Mardi Love, Kami Liddle, Cherchez La Femme (Sherri), Ansuya, Sadie, Ariellah, Vagabond Princess.  There's so many, really! But, also the legendary Mata Hari. Virtually ALL of them drew inspiration from her, and antique silent films, as well as Star Wars, Star Trek, and comic books.

 I'd been drawing furries for the longest time, and wanted to get back to human figures, and especially my own original characters BEFORE the internet had influenced me to change.  So, I started doing several bellydancer images with my own character, Lively.

Lively is a brunet, ranging from browns to black, but I've had her in various colored hair such as blue, indigo, purple, and green, usually a darker color. Just NEVER BLOND. Her skin tone can also range in many hues from fair-skin which is something I started doing as I got older, but originally she was either tanned, bronzed, or olive skin. So, this is 1 of several of her incarnations.

Original Sketch

Dark Earthy Cryptic Tribal Fusion Throwback from BlackUniGryphon on 8tracks Radio.

Fallen - Motion Graphics - Effects Animation in Adobe After Effects 2018

The Original Graphic:

Original Graphic

I reworked, re-painted, re-colored, and edited this in Adobe Photoshop CC 2018 & Adobe After Effects CC 2018 last week.
Some are longer Meditative loops, and it's basically my process as I was tweaking it:

Here's the original version I did several years ago:

You can find this on my DeviantArt Gallery.

I was suffering from very bad depression, AKA Heartbreak, and around 2009 was when I was going through some major changes within myself. That year I'd realized that many persons whom I'd believed were my friends, were not actually friends, but "friends", or fake friends. I'd also been going through some doubts about whatever my beliefs were, or what I'd thought they were. I'd already known that the government and political system was already flawed and broken, and you didn't need to watch X-FILES to know that... but, the new president at the time, whom I was very happy to have elected, had broken several of his promises, but talking about that made you persona non grata. It was also the aftermath of the Bail-Outs and the economic meltdown. I'd wanted to be at CAL-ARTS by that time, but was screwed by the economy.
Since governments, relationships, society, and even history came into question, things like religion, spirituality, and theology also did.... things just weren't adding up.... accountability was an actual thing. And, I became very enamored with Philosophy, ethics, and epistemology.

I remembered sitting at out cart/kiosk in the mall, with my sketchbook, trying in vain to sketch something. ANYTHING! And, NOTHING came out. It was THE MOST depressing thing! To be an artist, and award winning one, and not being able to draw. I cried EVERY DAY and at night. And, the ache was in EVERYTHING. Sometimes, I didn't eat.

I had NOTHING to look forward to, and all ANYONE ever had to say about ANYTHING was: Your daughter -blah-blah-blah... that NEVER cheered me up. It's a VERY sexist assumption, and I don't know whether it's worse from women or from men... but, I got it on all sides.

Then, out of nowhere, I gave up sketching, and just randomly doodled something only to have THIS show up on my paper.


I'd used this artwork for an album cover on 8Tracks.

The Sensuous Dream from BlackUniGryphon on 8tracks Radio.

The Original Sketch:

If you would like to create your own experimental graphic with these, color it in Photoshop, or print out and hand-color whether for fun, practice, or educational purposes you MAY do that, but NOT FOR PROFIT. I did license the sketch versions to the Creative Commons so you could do that.

Lively Unicorn Morph Animation Adobe After Effects Redux

I've reworked this to be closer to what I was actually, originally going for when I'd first produced it back in 2000-2001 in Adobe After Effects.

The original was hand-drawn by hand, and also the clean-up animation was hand-inked, then manually scanned & cleaned in Photoshop 5.0, 5.5, and 6.0 with my old, original, Canon scanner.

Old Version 2001/2005:

Reworked:

With Fog:

DeviantArt GIF

Older Version from Older versions of Adobe After Effects 2000-2005 & 3D Studio Max:

Spring n Summer Animation Tests: Lively 001

You know, last Semester (Spring Semester at UMASS Boston) I really did have quite a number of very nice animation concepts. Really I did. But, other people, and broken promises get in the way.

Here were some of the rough animation test I did, trying to learn some animation programs during the summer:

I had also cleaned up some old vintage pencil-test animation. Most of these were created at the U-ARTS Philadelphia from about 1996-1998. and the AIPH one was about 1999-2001(somewhere around there)

You know, it's just REALLY too bad that I couldn't really do what I actually wanted to do, and frequently had to compromise.

My original idea was a more stylized version of or own artistic interpretation for THIS clip form the 1980s:

I can actually DEFINITELY make that happen NOW. And, I probably will. I need to wrap up the "Maple Bacon" animated short I'm doing for my own animated independent film "Ying Qilin" with my daughter first, and I'm also a DP on another live action film "The Holy Maple Tree" in Brockton.

Inktober n Doodles: Lively at UMASS Boston

Some Inktober doodles I did at UMASS Boston


No time for refinement of sketching, just quick doodles:

#Inktober #doodle stuffs 🤷🏾‍♀️

A post shared by Kandice Kathleen Zimbleman 任思麒 (@blackunigryphon) on Oct 4, 2017 at 6:14pm PDT

#Inktober #doodle #inktober2017

A post shared by Kandice Kathleen Zimbleman 任思麒 (@blackunigryphon) on Oct 5, 2017 at 5:33pm PDT

#inktober #inktober2017 #doodles

A post shared by Kandice Kathleen Zimbleman 任思麒 (@blackunigryphon) on Oct 6, 2017 at 2:21pm PDT

#inktober #inktober2017 practice #doodles in my #UMASS #umassboston #notebook Lively #OC ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

A post shared by Kandice Kathleen Zimbleman 任思麒 (@blackunigryphon) on Nov 4, 2017 at 4:58pm PDT

#sketchbook rough #doodles #sketches

A post shared by Kandice Kathleen Zimbleman 任思麒 (@blackunigryphon) on Dec 3, 2017 at 9:18pm PST

"Eyewitness" Concept Art: Not Quite Storyboards Yet

I totally thought I could have this either done, or mostly done by now, since I wanted to have this storyboarded for my animated short. But, a number of things popped up. First I realized I needed to have a working character design for the little wild fox character, which I still haven't nailed down yet, but it definitely reachable.

A BIG one is my confidence, since I'm so frustrated with my drawing skills. my anatomy, proportions, etc. are just NOT up to the level I want. SO, not big deal, just do the Life Drawing stuff, or Croquis Cafe... but, I'm almost out of paper.... so, I'm guessing that's a cause for anxiety in the back of my mind... I also got sick. My lungs are infected right now, but at least I can see now.

I guess I'm trying to be as honest as I can with myself. I actually WOULD like this short to be a short, showcase of WHAT I'm capable of... however, I still need to rebuild and regrow back what I lost, and then go from there.

Then, I when I sat down several times to try and do some rough thumbnails for storyboards, I realized my vision of Lively look in this wasn't actually set... I usually have her more sleek, or sporty, even tho' she can also be VERY whimsical, and fantasy.

When I sat down for the first rough thumbnail this was what came out:

Eyewitness Skin Tight Look Concept Art 001 by BlackUniGryphon on DeviantArt

So, there she is, entering the savanna, but she's in a more sporty sleek look, which does tend to be typical of her that's skin tight.  I haven't decided on the final look for her satchel/bag yet. 

But, I'm definitely keeping the Thigh High "Pretty Woman" early 1990s boots! They will be flat tho', and EARTHY BROWN.

But, as a I sat down to work on another sketch for the Seven Days of Artworks Challenge THIS came out:

Eyewitness Hedroll Look Concept Art 001 by BlackUniGryphon on DeviantArt

So, the old early 1990s poet blouse look kinda came back. This is what I called "the Hedroll look" since Lively originally used to be 2 girls in the early 90s.

I'm torn between the 2 looks... the Poet Blouse will actually be a LOT more work, even if kept simplified. It would require layers of animation. However, it WILL make it look & feel better....

So, I'm torn.

Misc Lively Sketches January 2017

Some misc. sketches and doodles I did of Lively since I got tagged for the Seven Days of Artworks Challenge. 

It just sort of happened. Lately, Lively, has been having the BIG HAIR going on. It's kinda because i never really got as far as a I wanted with the storyboards I intended to do. 

Anyways, here they are:

Lively Raver Whimsy 001 by BlackUniGryphon on DeviantArt

Lively Is Bored by BlackUniGryphon on DeviantArt

#7daysofart #sketchbook #doodle #sketch #drawing #Lively is #bored. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. #cartoon #comics #anime #manga #gurl #lady #woman #maiden

A photo posted by Kandice Kathleen Zimbleman 任思麒 (@blackunigryphon) on Jan 10, 2017 at 7:05pm PST

WIP need to sharpen my pencils #skechbook #7daysofart #sketch #drawing #cartoon

A photo posted by Kandice Kathleen Zimbleman 任思麒 (@blackunigryphon) on Jan 8, 2017 at 11:25am PST

#7daysofart challenge #sketchbook #sketch #drawing #Lively ALL RIGHTS RESERVED #rave #raver #clubber #whimsical #whimsy #cartoon #girl #lady #woman #maiden #tribalfusion #boho #bohemian #freespirit #clubbing #anime #comics #manga #art #artwork #DJ #dancer #gypset #sexy

A photo posted by Kandice Kathleen Zimbleman 任思麒 (@blackunigryphon) on Jan 8, 2017 at 2:36pm PST

Drawtober Sketching Practice n Character Development

Rough Concept Character Development

Many times this month I kept having strong urges to sketch, draw, or practice, and #Inktober & #Drawtober were a very popular thing this year way more popular that previous years. I didn't really have time to do #Vlogtober this year either even tho' I'm studying video at UMASS this Fall.

I was researching quite a bit of Mongolian stuff for some parts regarding Djehkäujaa's story line. But, I wanted to practice more anatomy, which I haven't always been able to do, but I was practicing trying to draw some stylized art, and practice my skills because I wanted to develop Ao Xingtao more. I haven;t really settled on his final look yet, but I often feel like I'm getting there.

When I was practicing male human heads I often felt I was getting close, and I didn't want to go to sleep.

So, I was trying to study some stuff from Hogarth, whom is amazingly good, but it wasn't really helping me do what I personally wanted to do. I also often referenced some work by Heise. And, some various actors or models online.

Heads Practice Doodles 001 by BlackUniGryphon on DeviantArt

Heads Practice Doodles 002 by BlackUniGryphon on DeviantArt

Heads Practice Doodles 003 by BlackUniGryphon on DeviantArt

At some point I actually started looking for classic animation model sheets, and that was the best idea I'd had all month! Google had WAY more stuff than they'd available half a year ago, and I found so much good materials! I actually prefer animation artists' way of doing things, breaking stuff down,... well duh, I'm an animator at heart... so, that makes sense! 

Oh my! I especially loved all the Sinbad stuff! I just nabbed anything I could find on those! those were crazy good! And, those actually REALLY helped me out a lot! I want to focus more on structure, shapes, and form anyway. I also got other characters' model sheets from the Sinbad film! Yowsah! I haven;t seen that film in such a long long time! What a fun and sexy looking character! Right? 

Meh! I need to practice more!

Flirt Doodles Practice 001 by BlackUniGryphon on DeviantArt

Doodle 10 04 2016 Pair 001 by BlackUniGryphon on DeviantArt

Grope Doodle 001 by BlackUniGryphon on DeviantArt

Somewhere in my doodles this month some other content kept coming out of me, and it was on my mind, even tho' I was enjoying the Mongolian research, which I still want to find more stuff on, and I haven;t been back to Mongolia since 2008 briefly where I almost died of streptococcus in May. I was healed by relatives/in-laws of mine whom were all multi-scholars of not just Western Medicine, including the Russian versions and the Western European forms, but also were multi skilled experts in Chinese traditional medicines (there more than just acupuncture in case u didn't know) as well as their own personal studies... It also snowed, even tho' it was nearly June and all the crops had already been sewn. They also could talk to birds, and were friends with wild creatures... I kid you not. Many of the relatives were also incredibly tall due to high protein and calcium in the diet, and yes I ate copious amounts of MEAT MEAT MEAT MEAT MEAT and all kinds of dairy products including platters of cheeses and many kinds of yogurt anything and everything dishes and beverages.

Anyways, Mongolian tangent aside, I doodled stuff I wanted to develop, or at least set into images and design concept that had been in my mind for years.

I originally did this one a short while go:

Impetuous by BlackUniGryphon on DeviantArt

And then I wanted to go further with it. And develop it more, and test out how it looks, how I want to depicted... still not totally there, but getting closer... probably because I still need to practice and improve my skills.

Impetuous Grope by BlackUniGryphon on DeviantArt

I've mostly drawn, or depicted this character as more pleasant, and romantic, but actually in the story he starts out rather scary at times, and is often impetuous. He often screws up, and does the wrong things at the wrong times, is brash, selfish, rude, arrogant, impulsive, insensitive. He's not always this way, but it just happens. His feelings override his ability to think clearly, and he doesn't think things through, which is messed up because he's actually very intelligent.

He will also be going through some changes and in a weird twist he will end up too strict, conservative, and in many ways the opposite polar end of this... that won't last forever either.

But, for my own life, I often found many men whom would grope me, or girls I knew, often when no one was around. I personally hated being treated that way.

It's different if someone is giving you attention you want but also WHEN you want it, and WHEN its appropriate. I find that usually younger men can't understand this, and in some older men whom have pushed and pushed and gotten away with all kinds of wrong doings they actually don't view view you as a person, but as a thing, and don;t have the ability to empathize, or feel empathy for you at all.

Altho' he's guilty, there's a kind of innocence with youth... but, Lively won't have it. So, she resists him when he's disrespectful, or tells him off. She has mixed feelings about him because when he's in his better side or moods he's so likable, and they flirt like crazy, but he often overdoes something, or becomes consumed by his feelings for her, like a brute or a brat. He's also very intense, and physically forceful, and he often regrets his impulses, yet also has trouble understanding her reactions when they don't go as he assumed they would.

She is actually quite taken with him, and if he'd just calm down, and adjust his pace just a little, it wouldn't have been a problem at all. But, his lack of self control often pushes her away, hurts her, frustrates her, annoys her, and aggravates her. She's also in denial about her feeling for him, which are still developing because he's so rude, impulsive, brash, and impetuous at times, that it forced her to rethink whether he's likable at all, or worth her time. yet, whenever he lets up, and calms down, and stops trying so hard she can't help liking him so much because he's very funny, and fun, and also very handsome.

I do not know if nor when I'll be fully able to work on more with this, since I have a project due on Thursday for my video class, then I have a final. And, everyone seems to have some dire issue, like my daughter almost dying, my daughter getting sexually harassed and assaulted, killer flu, the US VP in town screwing up traffic for days, multiple injuries to myself, government paper work, doctor appointments, hospital appointments, 911 calls, ambulances, minor fights, and tons of other crap that just turns up EVERY FRIGGIN' WEEK!

So, whatevz...

Impetuous Xingtao n Lively Sketch 敖兴涛

Concept Art: Rough Sketch
敖兴涛 Ao Xingtao grabs Lively frightening her

 浮躁敖兴涛抓住 Lively
 急躁, 急性病,愣头愣脑,孟浪,卞,鲁莽的,欲望,要,媟

Since its October, that means the ever popular #Inktonber, only I don;t really care to use inks all the time (altho' I did do a butterfly yesterday) I felt several urges to sketch between working on my video project(s) for UMASS in my Video Workshop. But, then I found out through a child of my friend, whom I also somewhat view as a little friend (but getting BIG n tall) n friends' with my daughter, that #Drawtober was a thing also! #Vlogtober is also a thing, however, I'm unsure as to whether I will do it this year, or not.

Anyways, this was the first thing I actually intentionally used #Drawtober for.

I'm rather torn, since I quite enjoy video editing, and shorting video, as well as photography, and I apparently also like editing audio since I've done lots of it lately. But, I often find I wish to sketch, but since it's fall now, every second counts on good weather days, plus I'm borrowing the equipment from UMASS which often needs to get returned within days.

If I start sketching now, I won't stop.... but, I figured I'd blog this before I forget.

Impetuous by BlackUniGryphon on DeviantArt

I'm still sorta developing Xingtao, so he's still not completely set yet. 

At first, Xingtao is actually VERY SCARY at times, often impulsive, impetuous, brash, and inconsiderate. One of those instances of smart intelligent persons whom do completely stupid things, act without thinking, foolish behaviors, self sabotage. 

I still want younger teen aged Lively to have a number of male interactions. But, this guy will weave in and out. She won't really like him at first, and be interested in other guys. But, these 2 will get into a lot of flirtations, fun times, antics, and more. However, he can't often cope with his own intensity, because he's a very well liked person by so many folks, but his feelings for Lively will be a huge monkey wrench in his gears, that he often can't deal with properly, or correctly, and will comepletely screw things up. 

I think every girl has experienced the over zealous guy whom can't contain himself, or looses his self control, and on a whim disrespects the boundaries on his own selfish whims and impulses and also doesn't understand why you're reacting not in the way he wants.  

Here's what I wrote on Deviant Art when I published this there:

Lively: It scares me when you do that! 
Ao Xingtao 敖兴涛: My feelings scare me too.

Well, Xingtao is kinda scary at first. Despite bold flirtations between them, at times his emotions get sudden, and abrupt, and he's impulsive, brash, and acts without thinking. In the front of the theater by the parking lot, after work, after dinner with coworkers, they are walking to their cars, and after everyone has already driven off, as they walk to the other end he brashly grabs Lively and pulls her close to him.

It's utterly uncalled for, and inappropriate, and frightening. He's so overcome with the intensity of his own selfish feelings, longings, and desires that he doesn't realize he did the wrong thing, even after her frightened reaction. The totally wrong move in such a  WIDE OPEN situation, and so vulnerable. All of the security guards had already left the theater as well.

Too fast! Too sudden! Just because flirtations were going well earlier didn't make this the right time to do something that dumb, and thoughtless!

Trying to stay composed, yet still overwhelmed and frightened, Lively resists Xingtao, even tho' he's pulling her close to him.
The exact wrong thing! Bad move!
She liked you so much just a while ago, and now you go and pull a stunt like this? Idiot!

Lively, altho' nervous, and panicking, stays as calm & composed as she can, but begins pulling away, and listing a number of reasons as that she must leave.

She's not a thing, and not an object for you to use at your whim, and whatever it was you desired she definitely doesn't want anything to do with it now... and she'll try to stay a distance from you now... probably won't walk alone with you again...

Idiot! Why do you do these things? She actually liked you, and you're hot & sexy. You're so smart, but so stupid! Tactless! Clueless!


But, before long..... by a week or so, they'll be flirting all over again...
Maybe you'll get it right some day, you idiot!

If you'd just calm down, she'd melt all into you, the gravity and magnetism is already there.

Doodle 10 04 2016 Pair 001 by BlackUniGryphon on DeviantArt

#doodle #drawing #sketch #figures #OC #originalcharacter #sketchbook You scare me when you do that! --- Yeah, my feelings scare me too. #tension #confusion #badtiming #Lively #AoXingTao #Xingtao #conceptart #romance #lust #frustration #inappropriatecircumstances #brash #brashness #tooforward #toopushy #toosudden #jumpingthegun #lust #drawtober

A photo posted by Kandice Kathleen Zimbleman 任思麒 (@blackunigryphon) on Oct 5, 2016 at 5:53pm PDT

#drawtober #Sketchbook #sketch #drawing #OC #originalcharacters #Lively #zenithbeyondeclipsingthedragonsrue #tension #lust #romance #AoXingtao #inappropriate #brash #impetuous #emotional #love #intense #art #artwork #comics #cartoon #anime #manga

A photo posted by Kandice Kathleen Zimbleman 任思麒 (@blackunigryphon) on Oct 11, 2016 at 8:00pm PDT

#drawtober #sketchbook #sketch #drawing #OC #originalcharacters #cartoon #comics #anime #manga #Lively #AoXingtao #zenithbeyondeclipsingthedragonsrue ALL RIGHTS RESERVED #ART #ARTWORK #lust #love #brash #impetuous ##conceptart #inappropriate

A photo posted by Kandice Kathleen Zimbleman 任思麒 (@blackunigryphon) on Oct 12, 2016 at 10:18am PDT

#drawtober #sketchtober #sketchbook #sketch #drawing #OC #originalcharacters #Lively: It scares me when you do that! #AoXingtao: My feelings scare me too! #ZenithBeyondTheDragonsRue ALL RIGHTS RESERVED Kandice Kathleen Zimbleman #BlackUniGryphon #inappropriate #impetuous #brash #conceptart #love #lust #tension #art #artwork #anime #manga #cartoon #comics #romance #romantic #cinema #theater #theatre #xioabailian

A photo posted by Kandice Kathleen Zimbleman 任思麒 (@blackunigryphon) on Oct 12, 2016 at 5:18pm PDT

#drawtober #drawtober2016 #sketch #drawing #OC #Lively It scares me when u do that! #AoXingTao My feelings scare me too! #conceptart #brash #impulsive #impetuous #brash #inappropriate #coworkers #BlackUniGryphon #anime #manga #comics #cartoon #love #lust #emotions #romance

A photo posted by Kandice Kathleen Zimbleman 任思麒 (@blackunigryphon) on Oct 14, 2016 at 8:42pm PDT

I would like to develop this, and these interactions a lot more.

I've still never finished working on some stuff with Djekäujaa, but also I'm still working on my skills (if I have time) and still thinking up catsuit designs for Lively.

I have other concept designs for Xingtao later when he's older. , with the long hair.

i also wish to have the interactions with Xingtao to be the sexiest, but also a mixture of some of the strangest, and also most fun parts as well.
He's the most likable, yet the most infuriating, perplexing, but also he will have an aspect of mystique (which can be aggravating) because he can't entirely remember his past... or should I say, he can;t remember his past correctly, and had different identities as different roles in his life... he becomes so absorbed into whom he is in this world and life, and ambitions, that he doesn't even think the same way he once did as his original self....

He rationalizes this to himself, but also others view him apologetically, as being a foreigner as the excuse as to why he's odd at times.  It's similar to how adopted children, or kidnapped children, often completely forget their life before, and who they were, and become fully absorbed into their new identity, new life, and even entirely new personality... only to come to a shock when they start to remember things that don;t make sense, or are presented with the sudden, abrupt reality of being someone else, or that they had some other life way in the past.

I also want him to have a slight clash, but not so much, here n there with Djehkäujaa. Those 2 will never become intimate, because Djehkäujaa is, despite being highly sexy n desirable in her humanoid form, completely celibate. Djehkäujaa is a dragon through n through n feels no such attraction to human beings, at all, ever. Xingtao has the strange feeling that Djehkäujaa is somehow familiar to him, but unsure. But, Djehkäujaa scoffs at this idea. However, she will start to sense something about him also....

Ao Xingtao is all about Lively, even tho' he often flutters off into oblivion....

I would like him to start to become more mature, towards the end, but he will unfortunately become a bit rigid in some ways, because that's what happens to most men. He will eventually decide he actually wants to be a lot closer and more solid within Lively's life, and regrets all of his foolishness regarding her, and wants to completely be with her, pushing away any other men.... and despite her skepticism, he starts to sweep her off her feet hard.

The ultimate ending will, of course involve the main antagonist villain... Xingtao will of course be involved, because he's all about Lively now, and I will write it to make it seem as tho' Ao Xintao will be most likely to seem to be the victor, or hero... however, he will fall short by accident. NO, he's NOT the HERO.

Lively is actually a much stronger character, and just when you think she's the victor. NO! Not Lively! Djehkäujaa is! Because Lively & Djehkäujaa will have become like best friends.

Despite all of the surprises I have in store for Xingtao. Djehkäujaa will have ALL of the best ones, but they will come at towards the end. Xingtao's will be sometime past the middle.


 敖兴涛

I have one more surprise about Xingtao which is somewhat inspired by a very well known, and very creative, hoax done by a well known French artist of 2 mummified women found on the Moon, and the fake Apollo 20 Mission.

It's just the right kind of weird, much like "Eyewitness" my other story of Lively, that I'm looking forward to it.