Sunday, October 30, 2016

Drawtober Sketching Practice n Character Development

Rough Concept Character Development
Many times this month I kept having strong urges to sketch, draw, or practice, and #Inktober & #Drawtober were a very popular thing this year way more popular that previous years. I didn't really have time to do #Vlogtober this year either even tho' I'm studying video at UMASS this Fall.

I was researching quite a bit of Mongolian stuff for some parts regarding Djehkäujaa's story line. But, I wanted to practice more anatomy, which I haven't always been able to do, but I was practicing trying to draw some stylized art, and practice my skills because I wanted to develop Ao Xingtao more. I haven;t really settled on his final look yet, but I often feel like I'm getting there.

When I was practicing male human heads I often felt I was getting close, and I didn't want to go to sleep.

So, I was trying to study some stuff from Hogarth, whom is amazingly good, but it wasn't really helping me do what I personally wanted to do. I also often referenced some work by Heise. And, some various actors or models online.

At some point I actually started looking for classic animation model sheets, and that was the best idea I'd had all month! Google had WAY more stuff than they'd available half a year ago, and I found so much good materials! I actually prefer animation artists' way of doing things, breaking stuff down,... well duh, I'm an animator at heart... so, that makes sense! 

Oh my! I especially loved all the Sinbad stuff! I just nabbed anything I could find on those! those were crazy good! And, those actually REALLY helped me out a lot! I want to focus more on structure, shapes, and form anyway. I also got other characters' model sheets from the Sinbad film! Yowsah! I haven;t seen that film in such a long long time! What a fun and sexy looking character! Right? 

Meh! I need to practice more!

Somewhere in my doodles this month some other content kept coming out of me, and it was on my mind, even tho' I was enjoying the Mongolian research, which I still want to find more stuff on, and I haven;t been back to Mongolia since 2008 briefly where I almost died of streptococcus in May. I was healed by relatives/in-laws of mine whom were all multi-scholars of not just Western Medicine, including the Russian versions and the Western European forms, but also were multi skilled experts in Chinese traditional medicines (there more than just acupuncture in case u didn't know) as well as their own personal studies... It also snowed, even tho' it was nearly June and all the crops had already been sewn. They also could talk to birds, and were friends with wild creatures... I kid you not. Many of the relatives were also incredibly tall due to high protein and calcium in the diet, and yes I ate copious amounts of MEAT MEAT MEAT MEAT MEAT and all kinds of dairy products including platters of cheeses and many kinds of yogurt anything and everything dishes and beverages.

Anyways, Mongolian tangent aside, I doodled stuff I wanted to develop, or at least set into images and design concept that had been in my mind for years.

I originally did this one a short while go:

And then I wanted to go further with it. And develop it more, and test out how it looks, how I want to depicted... still not totally there, but getting closer... probably because I still need to practice and improve my skills.

I've mostly drawn, or depicted this character as more pleasant, and romantic, but actually in the story he starts out rather scary at times, and is often impetuous. He often screws up, and does the wrong things at the wrong times, is brash, selfish, rude, arrogant, impulsive, insensitive. He's not always this way, but it just happens. His feelings override his ability to think clearly, and he doesn't think things through, which is messed up because he's actually very intelligent.

He will also be going through some changes and in a weird twist he will end up too strict, conservative, and in many ways the opposite polar end of this... that won't last forever either.

But, for my own life, I often found many men whom would grope me, or girls I knew, often when no one was around. I personally hated being treated that way.

It's different if someone is giving you attention you want but also WHEN you want it, and WHEN its appropriate. I find that usually younger men can't understand this, and in some older men whom have pushed and pushed and gotten away with all kinds of wrong doings they actually don't view view you as a person, but as a thing, and don;t have the ability to empathize, or feel empathy for you at all.

Altho' he's guilty, there's a kind of innocence with youth... but, Lively won't have it. So, she resists him when he's disrespectful, or tells him off. She has mixed feelings about him because when he's in his better side or moods he's so likable, and they flirt like crazy, but he often overdoes something, or becomes consumed by his feelings for her, like a brute or a brat. He's also very intense, and physically forceful, and he often regrets his impulses, yet also has trouble understanding her reactions when they don't go as he assumed they would.

She is actually quite taken with him, and if he'd just calm down, and adjust his pace just a little, it wouldn't have been a problem at all. But, his lack of self control often pushes her away, hurts her, frustrates her, annoys her, and aggravates her. She's also in denial about her feeling for him, which are still developing because he's so rude, impulsive, brash, and impetuous at times, that it forced her to rethink whether he's likable at all, or worth her time. yet, whenever he lets up, and calms down, and stops trying so hard she can't help liking him so much because he's very funny, and fun, and also very handsome.

I do not know if nor when I'll be fully able to work on more with this, since I have a project due on Thursday for my video class, then I have a final. And, everyone seems to have some dire issue, like my daughter almost dying, my daughter getting sexually harassed and assaulted, killer flu, the US VP in town screwing up traffic for days, multiple injuries to myself, government paper work, doctor appointments, hospital appointments, 911 calls, ambulances, minor fights, and tons of other crap that just turns up EVERY FRIGGIN' WEEK!

So, whatevz...

Sunday, October 23, 2016

Art As The Sky [Poem]

By Kandice Kathleen Zimbleman Published HERE on DeviantArt
Art As The Sky

Art is sometimes like The Sky.

And yet, sometimes I feel myself floating and flying through it.
Like daydreams that find you,
And suddenly saturate the mind upon your person,
Flowing as currents that move,


There is no time,
You are completely free.
You are there, and always there...

Until you are not.
And, just as I reach it,
or be it,
or, am it...
Carried upon my person,
Filling the pockets upon my person,
What seems like forever.....
.....becomes fleeting.

The pockets become empty,
Pockets full of silence,
The empty pockets upon my person...

No pockets upon my person...
No sky within that which environs me...
For what would seem like a crash,
There is no crash.
Inertia is blunt.

Art is like The Sky....

And, yet, I can never reach it.

The confines of what environs me within it's pockets,
upon its person...
The Nothingness which prevents me restitution,
Is the Somethingness  which vetoes my recompense hence.

And, altho' I feel myself as The Sky...
I am The Sky.
I was The Sky.

Art is as The Sky...
And, tho' I could fly...
I couldn't reach it.

Art was as The Sky....
Inertia pressed me to cry,
Thus, I could never reach it...

Like a drop of color into the stream,
I dissolve into mass of flow,
But, it was beneath The Sky....

Didn't you know?
Sometimes, Art is like The Sky....
Tho' I flew,
I could never fully reach it....

The Willows that flow in the breeze represent my mind.

Sunday, October 16, 2016

Impetuous Xingtao n Lively Sketch 敖兴涛

Concept Art: Rough Sketch
敖兴涛 Ao Xingtao grabs Lively frightening her

 浮躁敖兴涛抓住 Lively
 急躁, 急性病,愣头愣脑,孟浪,卞,鲁莽的,欲望,要,

Since its October, that means the ever popular #Inktonber, only I don;t really care to use inks all the time (altho' I did do a butterfly yesterday) I felt several urges to sketch between working on my video project(s) for UMASS in my Video Workshop. But, then I found out through a child of my friend, whom I also somewhat view as a little friend (but getting BIG n tall) n friends' with my daughter, that #Drawtober was a thing also! #Vlogtober is also a thing, however, I'm unsure as to whether I will do it this year, or not.

Anyways, this was the first thing I actually intentionally used #Drawtober for.

I'm rather torn, since I quite enjoy video editing, and shorting video, as well as photography, and I apparently also like editing audio since I've done lots of it lately. But, I often find I wish to sketch, but since it's fall now, every second counts on good weather days, plus I'm borrowing the equipment from UMASS which often needs to get returned within days.

If I start sketching now, I won't stop.... but, I figured I'd blog this before I forget.

I'm still sorta developing Xingtao, so he's still not completely set yet. 

At first, Xingtao is actually VERY SCARY at times, often impulsive, impetuous, brash, and inconsiderate. One of those instances of smart intelligent persons whom do completely stupid things, act without thinking, foolish behaviors, self sabotage. 

I still want younger teen aged Lively to have a number of male interactions. But, this guy will weave in and out. She won't really like him at first, and be interested in other guys. But, these 2 will get into a lot of flirtations, fun times, antics, and more. However, he can't often cope with his own intensity, because he's a very well liked person by so many folks, but his feelings for Lively will be a huge monkey wrench in his gears, that he often can't deal with properly, or correctly, and will comepletely screw things up. 

I think every girl has experienced the over zealous guy whom can't contain himself, or looses his self control, and on a whim disrespects the boundaries on his own selfish whims and impulses and also doesn't understand why you're reacting not in the way he wants.  

Here's what I wrote on Deviant Art when I published this there:

Lively: It scares me when you do that! 
Ao Xingtao 敖兴涛: My feelings scare me too.

Well, Xingtao is kinda scary at first. Despite bold flirtations between them, at times his emotions get sudden, and abrupt, and he's impulsive, brash, and acts without thinking. In the front of the theater by the parking lot, after work, after dinner with coworkers, they are walking to their cars, and after everyone has already driven off, as they walk to the other end he brashly grabs Lively and pulls her close to him.

It's utterly uncalled for, and inappropriate, and frightening. He's so overcome with the intensity of his own selfish feelings, longings, and desires that he doesn't realize he did the wrong thing, even after her frightened reaction. The totally wrong move in such a  WIDE OPEN situation, and so vulnerable. All of the security guards had already left the theater as well.

Too fast! Too sudden! Just because flirtations were going well earlier didn't make this the right time to do something that dumb, and thoughtless!

Trying to stay composed, yet still overwhelmed and frightened, Lively resists Xingtao, even tho' he's pulling her close to him.
The exact wrong thing! Bad move!
She liked you so much just a while ago, and now you go and pull a stunt like this? Idiot!

Lively, altho' nervous, and panicking, stays as calm & composed as she can, but begins pulling away, and listing a number of reasons as that she must leave.

She's not a thing, and not an object for you to use at your whim, and whatever it was you desired she definitely doesn't want anything to do with it now... and she'll try to stay a distance from you now... probably won't walk alone with you again...

Idiot! Why do you do these things? She actually liked you, and you're hot & sexy. You're so smart, but so stupid! Tactless! Clueless!

But, before long..... by a week or so, they'll be flirting all over again...
Maybe you'll get it right some day, you idiot!

If you'd just calm down, she'd melt all into you, the gravity and magnetism is already there.

I would like to develop this, and these interactions a lot more.

I've still never finished working on some stuff with Djekäujaa, but also I'm still working on my skills (if I have time) and still thinking up catsuit designs for Lively.

I have other concept designs for Xingtao later when he's older. , with the long hair.

i also wish to have the interactions with Xingtao to be the sexiest, but also a mixture of some of the strangest, and also most fun parts as well.
He's the most likable, yet the most infuriating, perplexing, but also he will have an aspect of mystique (which can be aggravating) because he can't entirely remember his past... or should I say, he can;t remember his past correctly, and had different identities as different roles in his life... he becomes so absorbed into whom he is in this world and life, and ambitions, that he doesn't even think the same way he once did as his original self....

He rationalizes this to himself, but also others view him apologetically, as being a foreigner as the excuse as to why he's odd at times.  It's similar to how adopted children, or kidnapped children, often completely forget their life before, and who they were, and become fully absorbed into their new identity, new life, and even entirely new personality... only to come to a shock when they start to remember things that don;t make sense, or are presented with the sudden, abrupt reality of being someone else, or that they had some other life way in the past.

I also want him to have a slight clash, but not so much, here n there with Djehkäujaa. Those 2 will never become intimate, because Djehkäujaa is, despite being highly sexy n desirable in her humanoid form, completely celibate. Djehkäujaa is a dragon through n through n feels no such attraction to human beings, at all, ever. Xingtao has the strange feeling that Djehkäujaa is somehow familiar to him, but unsure. But, Djehkäujaa scoffs at this idea. However, she will start to sense something about him also....

Ao Xingtao is all about Lively, even tho' he often flutters off into oblivion....

I would like him to start to become more mature, towards the end, but he will unfortunately become a bit rigid in some ways, because that's what happens to most men. He will eventually decide he actually wants to be a lot closer and more solid within Lively's life, and regrets all of his foolishness regarding her, and wants to completely be with her, pushing away any other men.... and despite her skepticism, he starts to sweep her off her feet hard.

The ultimate ending will, of course involve the main antagonist villain... Xingtao will of course be involved, because he's all about Lively now, and I will write it to make it seem as tho' Ao Xintao will be most likely to seem to be the victor, or hero... however, he will fall short by accident. NO, he's NOT the HERO.

Lively is actually a much stronger character, and just when you think she's the victor. NO! Not Lively! Djehkäujaa is! Because Lively & Djehkäujaa will have become like best friends.

Despite all of the surprises I have in store for Xingtao. Djehkäujaa will have ALL of the best ones, but they will come at towards the end. Xingtao's will be sometime past the middle.


I have one more surprise about Xingtao which is somewhat inspired by a very well known, and very creative, hoax done by a well known French artist of 2 mummified women found on the Moon, and the fake Apollo 20 Mission.

It's just the right kind of weird, much like "Eyewitness" my other story of Lively, that I'm looking forward to it. 

Wednesday, October 5, 2016

Designing Lively's Catsuit & The Gardens of The Future Project

Halfway through my Mori sketch of Lively, I'd already felt a strong pull to Sci-Fi themes and futuristic ideas, since I was already on a HUGE Sci-Fi anime kick, and had watched the reboots of Evangelion, all of Macross Delta, and other Macross & Robotech stories, as well as the entire series of Lain. So, it's only a natural progression that it somehow morphed into an urge to do Lively back in a Sci-Fi theme which ended up coming back to my story... Funny how ur mind can do that...

Well, I started redoing and redesigning,or at least trying to come up with new versions of a Catsuit or full body suit which I often depicted Lively in since the mid 1990s as a kid.

I was often teased in college (UARTS & AIPH 1998-2001) that she was "naked girl". But, she wasn't naked, she was wearing a full body catsuit, sometimes with open feet, or with boots, or boots built on, and with or without gloves. I just wanted to focus more on the form & the proportions back then and NOT coloring, and getting as far away from OVER DETAILING my work which I'm prone to doing. (That may or may not be a good or bad thing.)

I felt that the full body suit, or catsuit, had a place more within the project she was heading. I've based much of the things she does in the story on my own teen-aged experience(s). There are not always as many opportunities for young people to step up and really do things for their community today as their were back then, or if they are they are less independence or responsibility driven. I had known many many young persons as a teenager whom were much smarter, and far more mature than not only their peers, but their teachers, parents, and most adults significantly older than themselves. Unfortunately, when you have a system that does help them, only to pull the rug out from under them just when they were getting somewhere and really shining it caused devastating problems, including depression, alcoholism, suicide, or self destruction. It's utterly a cruel thing to rob the brightest minds, and those with the best potentials for the sake of greed or destructive ideologies. I could think of so many instances where the best of my generation were cut down just before they were about to touch their zenith or apex. Those whom did EVERYTHING right, played it safe, were good persons, upstanding citizens, and real contributors. So, I wanted to incorporate the things that work when maintained into the story, yet still allow for areas where characters need to grow, and to address a transition in society, and the blow-back of ignorance whom can't handle progress, or whom have become so jaded because they never got that when it was "in their day".

A major key component of this story is THIS project: The Gardens of The Future Project(s)

I wanted to create an actualized transition of how it would go, and the kinds of ridiculous things peoples do to lash out as change even when its for their own benefit.

I couldn't decide on a single garden model because each region will have different needs, climates, and require specialized and tailored ways of being more effective, and yet even in colder climates tropical or desert crops could be grown in in greenhouses.

The projects will be all working and living experiments of multiple systems which are self sustaining, but will also change the way the monetary system is used. The standard of living will be so high, and so luxurious, and people will be able to pursue the highest things in life. If they wish to relax, it wouldn't be berated at all, because there would be so many options to do any number of things, and money will be used to enrich their experiences rather than being stuck in a survival mode. People would have more meaningful lives, have better relationships, and could travel with ease. Commerce would still exist, but it will be more of an extra thing. There would still be a mixture of regulated capitalism and socialized things, with lots of choices because different persons have different needs, and some need competition where as others do not.   Everyone could chose any number of things tat work for them, and change as frequently as they wanted.

Hunger would end, poverty would end, and everything would become a Renaissance.

Everything will already be heading into an automated robotic private sector anyway, and this project was meant to be the solutions to implement for that municipal transition. And, the people will have a lot of say, and interaction with the process.

However, the main antagonist will come at the project, placing it in jeopardy even tho' it's already paid for, and use propaganda, and smear tactics. He's greed driven, pompous, arrogant, and rude.

As for a number of design elements I'd wanted for these gardens, a key feature was making things functional, but also decorative, and pleasing to the eyes. Many green technologies are often jeered for being "eye sores" however, ancient technologies like windmills were once also viewed this way, and now seen as quaint, or charming.

I wanted windmills and wind turbines to be decorative, beautiful, and perhaps even whimsical, while also being practical, functional, safe, and unbreakable.

I had seen several styles of more decorative windmills and wind turbines this year, but I only have these simple model references here. I could see a number of ways to use structures like these in decorative motifs, with varying colors, patterns, and in different sizes to the point where it could be a cultural thing rather than a utilities only thing. I don;t like the idea of ONLY, White, Black, or bland metallic colors.

Regarding Hügelkultur Application into Permaculture Design:

This is one of my FAVORITE aspects of permaculture is that it can incorporate nearly ANYTHING within a balanced system design. Usually Hügelkutur is seen as "messy", ugly, untidy, unsightly, or too rugged looking. But, that's because permaculture farmers aren't horticulturalists.
Actually, I have several concepts for incorporating hügelkulture RIGHT into the buildings using gorgeous design-work for the maximal aesthetically pleasing view, but also to maximum shade crops, sunny crops, regulating temperature, and even the water table or watershed. This is so versatile, that the applications for this are ENDLESS, and once a proper balance is worked out it could easily sustain its self for generations.

Things that come to mind are re-purposing skyscrapers, old unused factories, unused spent mines, whole city blocks will become "Food Forests" and meal times will become much like Chinese holidays in that people will look forward to leaving the home/house/apartments and meeting their neighbors outside to share cooking, eating, live entertainment or exercise.  The experiences will go beyond the old classical Chinese Scholar's Gardens but incorporate a variety of urban cultures, and  massive exchange of ideas, creativity, problem solving, etc. And, anyone could easily visit other neighborhoods and interactively exchange anything.

These simple basic concepts could be incorporated in a vast number of ways, and methods to maximize output.

Picture the most perfect and most beautiful place you would, or could ever want to live in. No one would EVER in their right mind want to live in a life that force a "maximin" because that would be forced poverty, and a low standard of living. You would want to live at the maximum. But that would mean you would have the most choices, the most opportunities, and the best chances at even creating new ones, your own ones, or even helping others.

One gripe about permaculture Design is that it's ugly, or messy. But, many gardens are beautiful. There's NO reason to assume that ALL beautiful gardens could have no functionality, nor is there a reason to assume that all functional gardens must be messy, or ugly.

Think also a moment: If YOU were a wealthy person, whom had your wealth managed and sustainable, how would you live? Wouldn't you live sustainable?But, wouldn't you ALSO live at the maxium comfort you could possibly have? Would you provide the best, and most comfortable of choices, experiences, and circumstances for yourself, your children, your family, those you care about, etc.? You would. Many times when people often argue against a society of a higher standard of living they go out of their way to repeat stories about how Communism didn't work, or "the projects", or that people need struggles... and yet the very wealthy often have whole generations of people whom have extravagance just handed to them which they'd never earned, and yet often feel entitled to everything and also to take away from everyone else.

Tho' you may NOT need extravagance, a high quality standard of living, one that gives the bets options to all is actually a much better society because it has far more advantages than those whom ONLY lived forced onto the maximin.

Human history, and prehistory, has humans living in tribes or villages, and everyone in the tribe operated for the good of that tribe, or village. Agriculture however, caused a huge amount of inequality, slavery, and imbalance.

 Is it wrong for a richard to want to provide the best for his own personal family and self interests?

Because those whom would argue AGAINST providing for all in this way, would do this themselves for their own selfish reasons, to feed their ego's selfishness, and greed for power.

Yet, for all people, like the ancient villages and tribes, whom are a civilization, it makes NO SENSE to not utilize all resources and knowledge for the betterment of the societies. This is human nature, and we are also part of nature.

Fictional Rivendell: 

 Imagine a high tech, absolutely stunningly gorgeous, and breathtaking town, or city, or neighborhood much like the Tolkien fictional Rivendell.

There is no reason to assume that YOU do not deserve to live in such a beautiful place.  The color of your skin does not matter, your parentage does not matter.

Imagine a world in which you lived in a place like this, but permacultured, and absolutely breathtaking! You could visit other towns, and cities at your leisure. Everything was paid for, the energy, the transportation, you could spend your money, or save your money. AND, your life's work wouldn't be ONLY driven by money unless you wanted it to be. You would never have to take a job you didn;t want unless you wanted extra money. Or, you could live comfortably, with several options, and do whatever is actually meaningful to you in your life. you could actually participate in your community at will, because you had the time. You could take vacations, or trade and sap seeds or plants, or fruits from your home gardens.

The possibilities are endless, and if something doesn't work, you could figure out why, fix it, of find something better. 

here are some old styles of gardens that were enjoyed by wealthy folks in human history's past

Cultural Ideological Design such as a Scholar's Garden:

Moroccan Gardens

Terrace Crops to maximize space:

There are so many ways to utilize so many ideas, concepts, and things that already are proven to work.

We could all actually be living a better life RIGHT NOW. A better today, a better tomorrow, a better world, and better life.

But, you cannot understand it from your current way of thinking.

All of your fears are ones told to you to keep you in your place.

That is why this story is so important to me.
I wanted to show everyone that they took the WRONG PATH.

Lively Mori Sketch

I started classes at UMASS, but it was HELL. I had a number of medical issues which hampered everything, until I had to drop out of nearly everything. But, I kept the video class and my Work Study job.

Then, to make matters more absurd, my daughter had a life threatening condition and had to get a double blood transfusion, so we spent the entire weekend and most of Monday at The Tufts Floating Hospital in Boston.

I almost took her to the emergency room on Friday night, and she was slowly bleeding out to oblivion.... So, in order to cope with the entire nerve wracking situation despite the nerve wracking month of anxiety, insomnia, and severe depression I grabbed my sketchbook.

And this Mori sketch decided to sketch its self out onto my paper... it changed a number of times before it became this. I tried to keep it simple... I actually lost a lot of interest in it about halfway through, but Instagram seemed to like it somewhat.

But, Id already been on a SciFi futuristic kick the past few weeks, and as I was almost halfway doen with this sketch, I was already yearning for futuristic SciFi n Cyber Punk stuff, which was strange because I had been REALLY feeling this when I'd started it.

I could easily see this as an "Eyewitness" short from my other series revolving around mostly Lively. I could probably go several different directions with this, but especially if I had the right song or music.

However, I'm not so sure it;s really "fresh" or new, and probably is too similar to other things... I'm guessing... afew things come to mind...

if I were to get "Eyewitness" off the ground the way I want it to be, and perhaps is a fan-base liked this concept enough, I might actually create this as something...